Guest Writer Random Chronicles

Crazy me! Things you do NOT say in a job interview, but I intentionally do

2016 was a crazy year for me. I think it’s a year, if possible, I would relive over and over again. Technically one of my happiest years so far.

Things were just falling in place. Effortlessly. I think I was in the right state of mind and hungrier than ever before. Luck also favoured me.

My friend Eugene had just left for Australia, probably the bad-good thing that had happened that year. Before he left, we had this small party for him at my place just to reminisce because I knew it will be several years before we meet face-to-face again.

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The bash grew and more people joined including this fine girl I was really obsessed with. I spent the night hovering around her forgetting it was supposed to be a reminiscing party. By the time it was morning, we had talked about almost every other topic and she told me “i’ll see you soon” before l leaving for her place.

This was February, exactly a time like now.

I was working at Niaje then but I felt I needed a more sustainable place so I had sent a few CVs here and there. I got four interviews, and they all came in June.

If you don’t know much about basketball — NBA to be specific — June is when the finals go down. After months and months of grinding, bustling and utter focus, two teams meet for a best-of-seven games series. It has been happening since 1947 but in 2016, it was set to be different.

The stakes were too high for both teams.

First, a new kid on the block, Stephen Curry, standing at only 6’3″, was set to take down the 6’8″ monster, Lebron James, as the favourite NBA player. Lebron’s team also needed to win. Badly. For 52 years they had been trying and Lebron had promised 2016 was the year. Most prayed for Curry to win, Samorai stuck with Lebron.

Any NBA fan can testify 2016 brought back Micheal Jordan memories.

Lebron’s team won and he kept his crown as the best player. I felt like I was part of the team and had been invited to the parade to give a speech on how WE worked hard and stayed focused the whole year.

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So you can only imagine my mental state in those four interviews in June. I was glowing and the panel interviewing me didn’t really understand why.

The first one, which was at Royal Media, was rather awkward.

“So Javan, tell us something phenomenal that has happened that has moved you,” one member asked, hoping to get a rather journalistic reply — more of politics and less nonsense (sports and gossip).

“After 52 years we have…sorry, after 52 years, The Cleveland Cavaliers have finally won a championship. Lebron James has yet again proved he’s the best player in the planet. Not Curry,” I said.

A razor-sharp silence cut through the room. The five interviewers looked shocked. The interviewee, on the other hand, thought he gave a viable answer.

A we-have-never-seen-this-kind-of-madness face from each one of them quickly informed me they didn’t give a hoot whether Curry was a player or a cooking powder. They weren’t pleased at all.

“Is that all,” they prodded further. “I think so,” I held my ground.

TUKO will always be family!

In the remaining interviews, I promised myself to keep my basketball fairy tales locked up. And I almost did.

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My last interview was at this rather new blog that seemed to be shocking everyone. People weren’t happy with it, especially, other journalists. I wasn’t too sure whether I wanted to go but I needed a new job. ASAP. So I went and after a few written tests, I was called in for my interview.

Once again, that very same question popped up.

This time around, I composed myself, looked at the lady interviewing me and said: After 52 years, The Cleveland Cavaliers have finally won a championship. I think that’s great. 

She looked lost for a minute, but not shocked like the other five in my first interview. I sank in my seat as she asked a few more questions.

“OK, I believe that’s all. Thank you for coming,” she said.

“Thank you, Carole,” I said on my way out.

A couple of weeks later, I got a confirmation email from TUKO.

Let’s meet next Friday! 

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